Tuesday, June 30, 2009

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Heinz Catsup leaving the bottle travels at what speed? (25 miles per YEAR)
How long of a tunnel can a mole dig in just one night? (300 feet)
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Who made the first engines for Fords? (Dodge)
What nation consumes more Coca-Cola per capital than any other country? (Iceland)
What do they have in Japan that is edible, red and green and square? (square watermelons - they stack better)
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Monday, June 29, 2009

What snack did pilgrims eat at the first Thanksgiving dinner? (popcorn)
Proportional to their weight, men are stronger than what large animal? (horses)
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True or false? Mark Twain didn't graduate from elementary school. (True)
How old was the youngest pope? (11 years old)
How old were the world's youngest parents? (8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910)
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What do intelligent people have more of in their hair? (zinc and copper)
In the Caribbean, what kind of sea critter can climb trees? (oysters)
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True or false? An eagle can kill a young deer and fly away with it. (True)
Antarctica is the only continent without what kind of critters? (reptiles and snakes)
Write your obituary as if you lived life to the fullest. Then go out and do what you wrote.
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Have you laughed today? If not, why not? Take a laugh break. Go ahead, no one is watching you :-)
Do something just for YOU today... go for a walk, read a book, do some stretching, take a nap, SOMETHING.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

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Next time you look in the mirror, say "I'm lovable" ten times. I dare you. I DOUBLE dare you.
Take a deep breath. Stretch your arms above your head. Relax. Today is gonna be GREAT.
Today, throw out fifty things that are cluttering your life... then let me know how much better you feel.
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Does fuzzy logic tickle?
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Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
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What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroids.
If you don't pay your exorcist, you may get repossessed.
Two peanuts were walking down a spooky road at night. One was assaulted.
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"Dad, can you do my homework for me?" "No, I'm sorry, it just wouldn't be right." "Well, maybe not, but give it a try anyway!"
Why is 6 afraid of 7? (Let them try to guess, then give the answer.) Because 789. (7 ate 9)
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Always proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra?

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics.
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I'm right 98% of the time. Who cares about the other 3%?
I'm a pessimistic optimist. I expect the worst - that way things can only get better.
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Why isn't palindrome spelled the same way backwards?
"Doctor, there is a man here who thinks he's invisible." The doctor says, "Tell him I can't see him!"
I read a book on helium once. I couldn't put it down!
Time is what keeps everything from happening all at once.
There are two rules for success: 1.) Don't tell all you know. ;-)
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Take everything in moderation. Including moderation. Ha!
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Those that forget the pasta are doomed to reheat it. ~~groan~~
I wondered why the Frisbee was getting bigger, and then it hit me.
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I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog.

Friday, June 26, 2009

A conservative is just a liberal who hasn't been arrested yet.
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A liberal is just a conservative who hasn't been mugged yet.
I was born to be a pessimist. Yup. My blood type is B Negative.
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I just can't get enough minimalism.
I'll bet you I can stop gambling.
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Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.
Always under-promise and over-deliver. Your customers will be stunned into loyalty.
Restate your offer prominently on the order form or response device.
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When generating leads, sell the offer, not your product or service.
Get your customers emotionally involved by talking as if they already own your product.
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Tell stories about your products. People love stories.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

If your product has a flaw, bring it into the open right away. This makes the negative feature less negative. Then focus on benefits.
Be informal in your communications. No one responds to, "Dear Sir" anymore.
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In all your communications, strive to be credible and be clear. You'll sell more.
If possible in your product line, give away the "gun" and sell the "bullets." You'll sell tons of "bullets" this way.
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Remove all risk from your customer. Offer a $1 trial with a double their dollar back guarantee.
Make your offer so good, the customer can't resist.
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Forge strategic alliances with others in your niche. I'm always on the lookout for a new partner.
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Don't be afraid to ask for help. Ask your customers what needs changing. Ask your non-buyers what you could do better.
If you've got great products, don't be afraid to charge more. It's the fastest way to increase your bottom line.
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When making business decisions, ask yourself how much benefit the customer will receive.
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Send your best customers a real present in the mail. Tell them how much you appreciate them. They'll be astounded and tell everyone.
Call up a customer and chat. You'll rock their world and blow their mind.
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Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Have you followed up on your customers lately? If not, you're losing money AND customers.
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Pay it forward everyday. Help as many people as you want helping you. Don't expect payback to always come from the same people you help.
Don't "become" the authority in your niche. "BE" the authority, and then act like it.
All important question to ask your customers... How can I help you today?
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Go out of your way to give, and you'll be surprised how much you receive.
Online, all you have is your good name. Protect it and build it constantly.
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Always keep your word. Customers love that.
Put drop dead dates on all of your online offers to double and triple sales. Then stick to it.
Good morning all. Whats the headline news today? Did I miss anything over night?